I left services, and headed back home to pick up my cousin, and his son, and we went to my dad's congregation; and the message was again on the future Kingdom of God. That reoccuring theme is refreshing, especially since I personally have always looked at this world as a transition in passsing, always looking for the world to come; (His Kingdom Come, His Will Be Done)
The remainder of the sabbath was spent there at my dad's congregation. That night I chilled out with a group of people my age who go to the Messianic Synangogue I had visited earlier that day. I had been invited by my same friend. It was nice, we made sundae's, watched a really really good movie, and played taboo, which was fun AND FUNNY, lol.
It was nice to spend some time with people my age, and get away. It was not just a week ago when I was in mourning because of my present circumstance of not having a home congregation, and not being able to communicate with some people that I had become bound to over the past 5 years; so saturday, and saturday night was definetely a refreshing change, and blessing from the Most High.
I was also contacted by a ministry earlier on in the week, whom I plan to visit in a few weeks. It seems now that my prayers for fellowship and restoration may very well be the Fathers desire for me; for now I will simply take things as they come; and trust in Him along the way.
I'm grateful.
I have been focusing alot lately on my openness...I have always been open (embracing and trusting) with people in general. Ever since I can remember I have been this way, and when I came into the faith I would have scriptures in mind to balance and justify being this way,...follow peace with all men...honour all men, have a conscience void of offense toward God and man..etc. although I have gained much from this aspect of who I am, (invaluable life experiences, wonderful relationships/friendships.) I can never come to a point (I pray) where I lose the need to be circumspect. In my last congregation I was admonished in this regard often; (to be temperate, patient, and not hasty to give credit; all of which are what the scriptures say). I know at the root of all the changes that have happened within me in the past year and a half, (and what ultimately lead to my chosing to leave my congregation) was my openesss. Especially in regards to believers. I had (have) the mindset that, the differences in doctrine didn't (doesn't) matter, as long as the commonality was belief in and obedience to Christ. I viewed all sincere believers as my brothers and sisters, and apart of His body. My teachers, grew concerned for me because; although they knew that I was open, I was not quite being the person they had come to know me to be, and they were in fear for my soul...I had fallen in love with a girl I barely knew, I wanted to visit her and her family a few states away who I knew even less about; all because they were "believers". In retrospect I understand their concern, and I know now that my love was not dealt with prudently and hastened by my emotions. But what I do not regret is my faith and trust in her and her family as believers; because I have grown to know them as a family, and their fruits have shown this. But thats what started it all......my "love".....the many counsels because of this, and other things, and then, my dealings with other believers came, and from that I started to view things in scripture differently....and I kept these things to myself, convincing myself again that the dfferences, (this time with my congregations beliefs) didn't matter as long as we all served Christ..........regrettfully I didn't address my differences in belief with my congregation up front....over time my trust in my teachers began to change. I drifted away (in my heart)from them and other brothers and sisters in my congregation ...worst of all, I did not give the double honour, esteem, and submission to the oversight of my soul to my teachers as I am admonished to do in the scriptures. So the period of keeping my changing beliefs to myself and fighting myself to do right by the true family I had at my congregation was ended when alot of my dealings were called into question and everything came to a head, in a conversation that ended with me having to make a choice. The sad thing is I am recognizing all of this at a time where it seems like it may be to late.
Anyway, this is a long post, and I have spoken in a few moments what has transpired over almost a year and half. There is so much more, but, I guess whats up above is the esssence of it. Right now, I still feel a desire to be open, but I will not do so with fear. A friend of mines recently told me (in regards to what I have just shared above) that there "would be a fine line in being careful and operating in fear"...and hes so right, because the last thing I want to do is operate in fear....I am not given that spirit from my Father, and that very spirit is one of my greatest weaknesses; so many times in the past fear has obscured what is true, and heightened my insecurities, worries, and doubts. And yet, being open is what lead me to my last congregation (and the immeasurable blessings I received there), being open is what has allowed me to experience so much good that the Father has blessed me with in life; (in people and in life experiences.) And being open is continuing to benefit me even now. But this time, this time; I will be much more careful, much more mindful, and continue to place my trust in God, in my dealings with man. I will have my fear in him.
I will end for now. Shalom (Peace) to whomever reads this. Take Care.
Closing Scriptures:
*Isaiah 9:6-7 / 1 Corinthians 15:21-28
*2 Timothy 1:7
*Hebrews 12:14
*Acts 24:16
* Phillipians 2:3/1 Peter 5:1-5 / 1 Timothy 5:17
1 comment:
In regards to this statement up above.."I had (have) the mindset that, the differences in doctrine didn't (doesn't) matter, as long as the commonality was belief in and obedience to Christ. I viewed all sincere believers as my brothers and sisters, and apart of His body."
I want to point out something that a close brother told me recently; he said that in the end its going to come down to those who want to serve Christ and those who do not.
He was admonishing me to becareful with my openness to those who claimed to be believers.
And this I understand completely, however I have come to know that people of faith are at different points in their journeys with the Heavenly Father, and have different level of understanding, life experiences, and circumstances...yet the faith, the sincerity is still the same, and I am not one to judge. The scriptures also say to judge nothing before the time, and this is something I do not want to do...no one has made it, we are all trying to make it, and we would do well to be brothers and sisters to one another along the way.
Post a Comment